Pretend

I tried to pretend I wasn’t a poet,
that words weren’t effervescent,
and this spirit could live anchored in the sand

I tried to pretend I wasn’t a poet,
that I could delete passion with liquid logic,
watch my fogged breath be swiped clean

I tried to pretend I wasn’t a poet,
that my heart could believe whatever happens, happens,
and let the bow string go flaccid

I tried to pretend my heart didn’t need
to breathe on its own,
and that blank paper had no voice

I tried to pretend, but my heart was helium –
it grew new lungs and spoke in baby’s breath,
in whispers beating an arrhythmia,
forcing me to gasp for air and hear the calling of the wild white,
to listen to the deep blue me

I tried to pretend I wasn’t a poet,
but that was before I realized
my heart was magic

-art by Charlotte Atkinson